so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
