Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
