i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
