i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize