I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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