If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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