Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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