is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
