Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm like, not good at living.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
