someone threw a dead crab at me
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize