Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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