We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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