Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Randomize
