One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize