I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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