either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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