Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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