Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
My vagina is officially offended.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
