dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
