you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
