Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
She told me I should be a condom model.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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