My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize