he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize