I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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