i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
