Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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