My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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