Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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