Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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