Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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