awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize