Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
