maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
