the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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