that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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