I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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