that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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