he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
