thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
so let's talk penis.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
