A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
