Sry I called you an 8
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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