I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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