Having a random hookup so left but love u
My friends, they love my intelligence
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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