As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
