oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
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How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
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The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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