Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
