she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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