i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
