So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!