I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
