please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
